Tag: Facebook

Local Girls Do It Better

Ashley4 Comments

A few posts back, I mentioned that my husband and I are in the selling process with our home and are getting ready to move.  I don’t think that the couple moving in realizes that they’ve hit the neighbor jackpot by purchasing our house!

Our next door neighbors are wonderful people – they grab my packages if I’m out of town, they let me borrow an egg or two when my mom brain neglects to add them to the grocery list, and they keep an eye out for people who don’t belong in the neighborhood.  Pretty much everything you could hope for in a good neighbor.

I’d like to think I, myself, am a good neighbor as well.  Keeping with the theme of being neighborly and kind to one another, I wanted to share some juicy gossip with you about “the girl next door”, her name’s Nicole, for all those wondering.

She is a local boss lady who owns and runs one of the greatest little boutiques to happen to our town – Pink Arrows Boutique.

Cute and oh so soft pullover sold at Pink Arrows:

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If you have spent any time in Benicia, (in my case, the majority of my childhood and now adult life) then you know we have a plethora of hair salons, antique shops and mediocre food.  Now Benicia can not only be known to the world as the state’s third capitol, but the home of Nicole’s Pink Arrows!

Nicole’s boutique is in a quaint location and is as friendly as she is:

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Here’s some Q + A and inside scoop on the owner, Nicole, and her dream, turned reality:

What inspired you to start Pink Arrows Boutique?

My love for fashion was nurtured as a child….and while still in pigtails, my mom taught me how to sew.  Over the next 20 years I graduated from FIDM (Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising) and built an extensive career that included design, merchandising, buying and quality control.  But, my dream was to always open a boutique.

About three years ago, when I was between jobs, I decided it was time, and the idea for my boutique began.

How’d your boutique get it’s name?

The name Pink Arrows balances bold symbols of beauty and strength.  Throughout my life I have admired many women, including my mentors – my mom and grandmother – in their aspirations to successfully combine the two.  My goal is to fill my boutique with modern, yet cozy and bohemian, glamorous clothes and accessories that women will covet.

What do you think makes Pink Arrows special?

My goal is to always look for pieces that have the softest fabrics, the best fit and the most unique graphics.  I have spent a good part of my career in sourcing and quality control, visiting factories overseas, and I have a unique eye for detail.  Sourcing is my passion.  

I love when customers are surprised at the range of sizes and prices that I carry.  I’m not just trying to cater to one age group or one body type.  It’s a good feeling when someone walks in skeptical and leaves having found something they love….and with a smile.

What’s the toughest part about running your own business?

The same challenge every woman feels – there is never enough time in the day for everything!  Trying to balance work, family, friends, etc., there is always a trade off (sometimes it’s sleep).  I truly believe if you are doing what you love, it doesn’t feel like work.  I have had some jobs during my career that were tough to wake up for everyday, where the work environment wasn’t positive, or the commute was CRAZY LONG.  I am super grateful to live in Benicia and work in Benicia.  I get to surround myself with so many amazing people on a daily basis.  

Do you have any future plans for the business?

My goal for the last few years has been to find a location in Benicia for my shop.  Now that I’ve found it, I’m settling in to my new surroundings and constantly trying to improve the space.  I am loving that I accomplished that goal and now I realize I need to set new goals for the future.  For right now, I’m just grateful.

If you could raid one celebrity closet, whose would it be?

That is a tough one!  There are so many great style icons, but if Nicole Richie were my size, she would definitely be my pick.  I love how she mixes bohemian prints in such a fantastic way.  She is fearless and has a confidence that is contagious.  I admire people who take risks with their style and are not afraid of what others will say.

It’s only appropriate that Nicole loves another Nicole’s style:

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I don’t know about you guys, but I love everything that Pink Arrows Boutique is about – from how it got it’s name, to Nicole’s attention to detail!  It’s definitely the kind of place I want to tell my friends about.  I’m also all for a supporting local, especially when the woman who owns and runs the boutique wants to represent women of different sizes and styles.

Life is too short to be tearing others down.  We need to support one another and be happy for the achievements of others.  Get out there and spread the word about Pink Arrows, or better yet, come check it out.

You better believe I picked up something for Gia and myself during our Saturday afternoon downtown stroll….

Picture of the goods that Gia and I scored:

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Pink Arrows Boutique Business Hours:

Currently the shop is still on “summer hours,” and is open Tuesday/Wednesday from 10 a.m. until 2 p.m.; Thursday/Friday from 10 a.m. until 2 p.m., & 4 p.m. until 6 p.m.; Saturday from 11 a.m. until 1 p.m., & 2 p.m. until 4 p.m.  They are closed Sunday and Monday.

You can make an appointment by e-mailing Nicole at nicoley@pinkarrows.com, or calling 844-264-6456.

They will adjust their night time hours to shorter “winter hours” in November.

Pink Arrows Boutique Address:

301 First Street, Benicia, CA 94510 – They are located in the courtyard between Plein Air Gallery and Gallery 621, just past Rookies Bar and Grill.

 

 

Social Media Sharing

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I hate the feeling that I need to endorse the things that I’ve decided to share through social media, more specifically, Instagram.  I think that it’s a somewhat normal feeling for someone living in a social media obsessed world.

I must admit…Instagram, Facebook and Snapchat have me in a very love-hate relationship.  I genuinely like these platforms for the simple fact that I can connect with friends and family that I don’t get to see on a regular basis.  I’ve been able to use Instagram and Facebook to connect with people I otherwise thought I would never see again.  I think it’s awesome!

For example, last week I was able to connect with a friend from high school who I haven’t seen since graduation day!  Now that Instagram has a story feature, I am guilty of posting a lot of videos of my daughter, Gia.  The cool thing is, old friends feel comfortable enough to comment on these videos, which leads to a conversation and reconnection, just like it did for me last week.

I was able to meet up with my said friend from high school to have some much needed mommy talk, as well as meet her darling son.  Not to mention, this was an especially cool reconnection because she now lives in Europe with her husband and baby boy.  This probably never would have happened if it weren’t for social media.

So, that’s the “love” part of my love-hate relationship with social media.  On to the “hate” part…..

I do not enjoy that when I hit the post button I wonder if anyone will like what I’ve shared.  Again, I think this is a common thought amongst many people using these platforms, but I still hate it!  I hate that Facebook and Instagram encourage a kind of hierarchy over how many likes a photo, video or post will get.  I thought popularity contests were over after high school!  I hate that some people judge who you are based on how many likes your latest Instagram post gets.  You should be judging me based on my character and my intellect!  Why do I even care?!  Why does it even matter?!  Do you want the short answer to that?  I don’t care.  It doesn’t matter.

I do have to convince myself at times that I don’t care, or that it really doesn’t matter.  One thing is certain though – I definitely care less and these things matter less because I have a greater purpose in life now.  I am a mother.  I want to teach my daughter that her self worth is not based on how many likes a photo gets.  I want her confidence to come from within.  This is why I am putting myself out there more.  This is why I am writing this blog.

Yesterday I did something that was WAYYY out of my comfort zone.  I posted an Instagram story of me talking directly to whoever decided to view it.  Terrifying right?!  I told my husband that I’d be upstairs attempting to record this story, then he gave me a silly smile and said, “good luck.”

I must have recorded it three times over!  I didn’t record it that many times because I thought I looked and sounded ridiculous.  I wanted to keep some authenticity to it by being myself – hair in a frizzy bun, Lulu Lemon uniform on.  I recorded it more than once because I realized that I didn’t know what I wanted to say.  On the third attempt, it just finally came out with a somewhat natural flow.

The hardest part was rewatching it.  I found myself cringing, doling out all kinds of awful criticism and negative self talk.  I realized that as I was thinking those things about myself that I needed to just stop.  Get over it!  What I was doing to myself was everything I do not want Gia doing to herself as she grows up.  I reminded myself that trying something new like this is going to be far from comfortable, but that’s how I’m going to grow and learn.

So, as awful as social media can be, it can also be something really great.  Yesterday I didn’t let myself delete what I posted.  The longer I kept my posted story up, the more I didn’t care about what others thought of it, or how many people had viewed it.  As corny as it sounds, I felt empowered and excited!

I give so much credit to people who blog for a living and are successful with it.  I can only imagine how hard it is to deal with all of the thoughts I dealt with yesterday, but on a much greater level.  Even though there are plenty of bloggers and social media fixtures out there who have an impressive and loyal following, there are still the haters and bullies trying to cut them down.

No matter who likes, or doesn’t like what you do, keep going.  This is me doing just that!  I know it’s only the beginning, so talk to me in a couple of months and let’s see where I’m at!

Everyone’s A Critic

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Parenting is not for sissies.  I’m sure the more seasoned parents our there are thinking, “Well, duh!!!”  No matter how many children you have, or how old your children are, it’s not easy hearing others criticize your parenting.  It’s inevitable that people will offer up unsolicited advice and make insensitive comments, even if they don’t have children themselves.

Who’s with me when I say, I just want to tell people I know who don’t have kids that they’ll understand one day when they do?!  I know, I know, I can’t be saying those kinds of things to people, but I sure do think it.  Now that I sound like the insensitive one, I’m curious, what do you do when someone – whether a family member, friend, or total stranger – criticizes your parenting?

I’m obviously not at the point where I’m doling out some tough discipline to a teenager, but I do take Gia to play dates where it becomes apparent to me that not everyone will parent the same way.  And that’s what is great about this world – we are all different, even our parenting styles!

This got me thinking about how often parents endure criticism, and it’s probably on the more often than not side of the spectrum.  I’m of the belief that it is nobody’s business to butt in, and if they do, the comment is likely reflective of their own personal issues and not my parenting.  Either way, I have a hard time biting my tongue when it comes to anything regarding my daughter and the opinions of others.  Maybe it’s the protective mother bear in me, or maybe it’s that I don’t give a sh*t about what others think now that I’m more sure of myself as a person since becoming a mother.

I also realize that comments from very close friends and family usually are coming from a place of love and concern, but that doesn’t make them any less irritating.  Dismissing criticism from friends and family can sometimes be hard, but it’s also a good time to check yourself.  I think I’m a damn good mom and I take any criticism as a learning experience, but that’s hard to remind myself of in the moment.  If I can learn something about my parenting style, how to “improve” it, or if I can learn how to shrug off inappropriate comments, then that’s a win.

I’m always wondering about how others deal with any parenting criticism.  Feel free to comment and share your experiences, or some fun stories about when you may have been overprotective/defensive in your response.

Any tips on how to discipline a toddler are also welcome!  Trying to prepare myself for these things as Gia continues to grow more independent by the second!  It blows my mind that someone who turned one a month ago can already have such an obviously strong personality.  I think I’m in for it during the teen years!

Move It, Or Lose It

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It’s hard for me to believe that Craig and I moved into our home 2+ years ago.  Before living in the house we own, we were renting a three story town house on the waterfront where we live.  I have to say, we loved that place!  It was so great because it was within walking distance to just about everything – restaurants, the local wine bar, the grocery store, parks and our gym.

After living in our town house, we knew eventually we wanted a home with a yard for our dog.  We also realized that three flights of stairs weren’t the best for a couple who knew that they would one day be adding to the family.  It was time to look for our first house!

We had a lot of support from our family during the house hunting process.  Buying a home, especially for the first time, is extremely stressful.  I found myself constantly wondering if we were doing the right thing by looking to buy at that time, which was 2015.  The housing market can be such a gamble, and I am by no means fluent in that area!

Some good fortune came upon us at the end of July, 2015, but we had our fair share of bad luck before that.  Craig and I had put several offers on homes in the town we grew up in, only to be outbid.  Our spirits weren’t as high as we wanted them to be, but after hearing a few stories from our friends and the experiences they had buying for the first time, we knew that we had to be patient.  A family friend of ours had told us they put 22 offers on houses before one was finally accepted.  That’s California for ya! Crazy, right?

During this whole process, we had become slightly obsessed with browsing the likes of Zillow and other similar websites.  One evening, as we were laying on the couch and glued to our phones searching these sites, we stumbled upon a beautiful home that seemed perfect for us.  Craig and I knew that if we wanted a chance at getting this home, we would have to act fast.

The following day we went to an open house for the property, but it wasn’t your typical open house…..the home owners were present.  At first I thought that was a bit odd, but it ended up helping us, not hurting us.

As you know, I’ve said I’m very close to my family, so it only made sense that Craig and I bring my parents and his parents to this open house.  Their opinions mean a lot to us and we wanted them to be included in this process.

You can probably sense where this is going…..yes, we fell in love with the house; yes, we put an offer on it; yes, WE GOT IT!  The couple who owned the home before Craig and I were moving to Lake Tahoe and wanted another family to live here who would appreciate the home as much as they did.  We came to find out that the wife taught Craig’s older sister, Michelle, in high school.  Not only that, the husband knew my dad’s high school football coach, a man who my dad really respected.

It was these little connections that really helped us stand out to the homeowners, and ultimately it helped them decide to sell the home to us.  We drafted a nice letter to them as well (icing on the cake), telling them that we wanted to start our family in this home.

Two years later, I’m sitting here in my first home, that I’m about to move out of, typing this post.  We kept our promise to the couple who lived here many years before us, and we started our family in this home.  This was not only my first home, but the home that we brought our sweet Gia to after leaving the hospital when she was born.

A big part of me is sad that we are selling our house because we started our little family here.  An even bigger part of me is excited to be selling it.  It means that we need more space for more fun and eventually, another child.

Although I’m not ready to have another baby just yet, the thought of it is wonderful.  Before we continue adding to the family we need to find our next house, which has proven harder than finding our first!  In the mean time, my awesome parents are letting us stay with them until we find our perfect next home.

There is a lot of uncertainty in the air, since we have no idea when we will find the right house, but I feel extremely fortunate to be in this situation.  We wouldn’t be able to do what we are doing without the love and support from my parents and my in-laws.  They are always willing to help us, whether that means watching Gia for a couple of hours, getting us boxes, or sending us new listings to look at.

Family really is everything, and without ours, Craig, Gia and I wouldn’t be the people we are today.  We are so excited, and a tad scared to embark on this next chapter.  I’m mostly scared of tackling the situation in our garage before we move.

Stay tuned, and keep your fingers crossed while we continue our house hunt!

Let’s Try This Blogging Thing Again

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In this day and age it seems as though everyone is self proclaimed model, or a blogger.  Since I can’t cut it is a model,  I’ll go ahead and jump on with the rest of the bloggers out there.

I’ve always toyed with the idea of sharing my thoughts, likes/dislikes and passions with others through these great blogging platforms that are out there now.  I’ll admit, I’ve attempted to start a blog a time or two already and have fallen off the horse.  I think the main reason why I haven’t stuck with it is my fear of being judged by the outside world, or worse….by my friends and family.

Now I’m finally at the point in my life where I feel sure of myself on most days, and I’m pretty confident in my own skin.  A lot of that has to do with the little girl I give birth to last year.  She makes me want to be the best version of myself.

Being a mom has given me the courage to look within and ask the tough questions.  Over the past year and a half I’ve dealt with anxiety, stress, happiness and an overwhelming amount of love.  I realize I’m not the first mom to be saying these things, but this is the first time I’m talking about it with others.

My hope for starting to write again and share my thoughts is that others feel brave enough to take on something that they were scared to pursue – a big career move, a new workout, a recipe….you name it.  I also would love to think that other people like me will enjoy reading about my everyday adventures as a young mother navigating my way through parenthood, while trying to maintain my sense of self.

Here’s to the beginning!  There couldn’t be a better time than now.